When I was about eight years old, a school friend told me this story right where he was having a wee and he somehow knocked a toilet roll into the toilet and got wee on it and his dad came in because he had caused such commotion and his dad was eating an apple and that fell in the toilet and there was wee on the apple and I thought this was the funniest thing I had ever heard.
Then a short while ago I nearly dropped my phone in the toilet to avoid knocking a toilet roll and a can of air freshener in the toilet. The phone fell on the floor and I was releaved but the floor was wet, not with wee I hasten to ads, and the phone was okay for a short while but then the whole screen went red which was clearly not a good thing and then it wouldn't turn on at all.
I don't know if it was because I'd dropped it or something else I'd unknowingly done, or if the phone was just faulty but I now did not have a phone. I was able to book myself in at the nearest Apple Store (Brent Cross) Genius Bar (a name that always makes me gringe, and since the phone was not very old I suspected they would just replace it.
The Masque of the Red Screen took place on Sunday and my Genius Bar Waltz was scheduled for Wednesday evening.
I had three days without a phone. What would I do?
Wake up in the morning, what's the time? No idea, I don't have a watch, I use my phone.
Is my train going to be on time? Hang on, I'll boot up the laptop...
Shall I listen to some music on the train? Erm... no can do.
It went on like this. To be honest, the worst part was where I might, given an idle few minutes, browse the Internet aimlessly or whatever, I no longer had the choice.
I did a lot of reading, which was very pleasing, but I do like when reading in public to have the earphones in to block out and make me concentrate more. This wasn't an option.
And when I went to Brent Cross I didn't know if there were bus issues, couldn't listen to music or browse the Internet on the way there.
(the bus to Brent Cross is one of those terrible tiny local bus things that literally goes round the houses to get there)
And when I got there I had no idea what the time was so I had no idea when I was due to meet my Genius.
As predicted as I was within warranty I got a new phone and all was well with the world again.
The only plus point is that I'm too old to be a digital native. The thought of being one of them and without a phone terrifies me.
